Wednesday, April 16, 2014
Wednesday, September 25, 2013
Just Ramblings.........
I often wonder if life is like an ever evolving crysalis, you know like a butterfly cocoon. I seem to be going through changes so fast it sometimes makes my head spin. I seem to be unable to get a grasp on how things are supposed to be and where I'm supposed to be going. I want so many things. It seems as though my wants and needs are two different things, I want things that seem somewhat irrational to me, I mean frankly, who am I to think I'm supposed to have all I desire. And desire is one of those other things, I'm not sure if it is our minds way of telling us something is missing or if we truly ever want anything and how in the hell are we supposed to know the difference?
I think I may be trying to live in the past just a smidge, but that's my deal. I don't wanna grow up right now, I've always been told don't do what I don't wanna, in regards to myself. And guess what, I don't wanna. I know that it is an irrational way to think and feel, but it's what's going on right now. I'm not sure of myself the same way I was not so long ago. It's very odd to me that even after all the growing up and maturing I've done I still feel like a scared child sometimes, and I know a lot of it has to do with my childhood and the way I was raised, but seriously I'm done being insecure and feeling like everyone else is more important. I for once wanna put me first and do what I wanna do and be the person I wanna be, and is that so much of a crime, or against the rules of play?
I'm slowly learning that not all things in life we want are good for us. Just because we want them doesn't mean they are what we need. I want a lot of things and most of them I am blissfully unaware of and that's A OK in my book right now, I have enough undecided bullshit going on to have to worry about all the shit that isn't exactly the most important things right now. I'm trying to actively cope with my emotions and how they make me feel, I'm like a very large only half working stove. Sometimes I'm hot and sometimes I'm cold. There seems to be a large in between, I may be mad, sad or just pissed. With all I have going on, sometimes it's hard to tell one emotion from the next. I know that I cry way too much, and am beginning to wonder if maybe I have some sort of hormonal imbalance going on or if I have just reached a time in my life where I am overly sensitive to things and feelings. Who knows, time will tell me I'm sure.
I've decided that writing is a good outlet for all this craziness playing ping-pong in my mind, I have to have some way to express it and get it out so that way maybe I can really analyze what's going on with me and what's real and what is a ghost from the past back to haunt me and make me feel weak and helpless. One day I hope to have myself back and be on an even playing field, but for now, I'm resigned to let it roll I guess. I mean really do I have a choice in the matter?? Nope not one choice that is better than what I'm already doing. I just really feel lost sometimes and am unsure of what I should attribute it to.........Am I, in getting older, really loosing me or just evolving into a more kick ass person than before? I'm not sure but I do hope it's the later of the 2. I hope that when all the curtains are pulled and the doors opened to let in the light that I will finally recognize myself in all of this madness.
I have so many hopes and dreams that seem to be very very unattainable at the moment, hell ever, for that matter. But in all this shit I have been dished out I haven't quit dreaming and hoping. I want to one day successfully write a book which seems far fetched to me, and hopefully it is one dream that I can realize soon. I want to change people's ways of thinking when it comes to religion and how they see other's faith's. I want to have a store and coffee shop and lots of amazing music. I just don't wanna die and not leave a piece of me behind for the world to feel and see and enjoy if that's possible. I guess I just don't wanna go before being able to make my mark and leave something from the heart behind.
I often contemplate the meaning of life, or rather what it means to me. I've given thought to the idea of soul mates and if it is even really a real thing or not. I'm not sure, the jury is still out on it. I often wonder what it is I'm supposed to be learning along the way? It just seems that sometimes in life people have an inability to be happy because they have witnessed so much unrest and unhappiness in their own lives. I often wonder if that in and of itself is my issue? Or if I am really happy and am just holding myself back from realizing it.......who ever really knows?
Is it ever really rational or acceptable to wish for things that we know we can't have, or is it just another form of keeping our dreams alive?
I feel like stagnant water, it's like I only do the same things over and over, it seems to be a mind numbing, never ending cycle. I feel like I am sitting here just wasting space, for all the potential I have, I need to be doing something, not sure what but I need to immerse myself in something that makes me happy and brings out the creativity in me. I have to learn to deal with my emotions and quit letting them bottle up and run over.
It feels as tho there is a gaping hole in the middle of me, like I have misplaced or lost or just haven't yet found that one piece of me, and I'm just now really figuring out that I have to have that piece too.
I think I may be trying to live in the past just a smidge, but that's my deal. I don't wanna grow up right now, I've always been told don't do what I don't wanna, in regards to myself. And guess what, I don't wanna. I know that it is an irrational way to think and feel, but it's what's going on right now. I'm not sure of myself the same way I was not so long ago. It's very odd to me that even after all the growing up and maturing I've done I still feel like a scared child sometimes, and I know a lot of it has to do with my childhood and the way I was raised, but seriously I'm done being insecure and feeling like everyone else is more important. I for once wanna put me first and do what I wanna do and be the person I wanna be, and is that so much of a crime, or against the rules of play?
I'm slowly learning that not all things in life we want are good for us. Just because we want them doesn't mean they are what we need. I want a lot of things and most of them I am blissfully unaware of and that's A OK in my book right now, I have enough undecided bullshit going on to have to worry about all the shit that isn't exactly the most important things right now. I'm trying to actively cope with my emotions and how they make me feel, I'm like a very large only half working stove. Sometimes I'm hot and sometimes I'm cold. There seems to be a large in between, I may be mad, sad or just pissed. With all I have going on, sometimes it's hard to tell one emotion from the next. I know that I cry way too much, and am beginning to wonder if maybe I have some sort of hormonal imbalance going on or if I have just reached a time in my life where I am overly sensitive to things and feelings. Who knows, time will tell me I'm sure.
I've decided that writing is a good outlet for all this craziness playing ping-pong in my mind, I have to have some way to express it and get it out so that way maybe I can really analyze what's going on with me and what's real and what is a ghost from the past back to haunt me and make me feel weak and helpless. One day I hope to have myself back and be on an even playing field, but for now, I'm resigned to let it roll I guess. I mean really do I have a choice in the matter?? Nope not one choice that is better than what I'm already doing. I just really feel lost sometimes and am unsure of what I should attribute it to.........Am I, in getting older, really loosing me or just evolving into a more kick ass person than before? I'm not sure but I do hope it's the later of the 2. I hope that when all the curtains are pulled and the doors opened to let in the light that I will finally recognize myself in all of this madness.
I have so many hopes and dreams that seem to be very very unattainable at the moment, hell ever, for that matter. But in all this shit I have been dished out I haven't quit dreaming and hoping. I want to one day successfully write a book which seems far fetched to me, and hopefully it is one dream that I can realize soon. I want to change people's ways of thinking when it comes to religion and how they see other's faith's. I want to have a store and coffee shop and lots of amazing music. I just don't wanna die and not leave a piece of me behind for the world to feel and see and enjoy if that's possible. I guess I just don't wanna go before being able to make my mark and leave something from the heart behind.
I often contemplate the meaning of life, or rather what it means to me. I've given thought to the idea of soul mates and if it is even really a real thing or not. I'm not sure, the jury is still out on it. I often wonder what it is I'm supposed to be learning along the way? It just seems that sometimes in life people have an inability to be happy because they have witnessed so much unrest and unhappiness in their own lives. I often wonder if that in and of itself is my issue? Or if I am really happy and am just holding myself back from realizing it.......who ever really knows?
Is it ever really rational or acceptable to wish for things that we know we can't have, or is it just another form of keeping our dreams alive?
I feel like stagnant water, it's like I only do the same things over and over, it seems to be a mind numbing, never ending cycle. I feel like I am sitting here just wasting space, for all the potential I have, I need to be doing something, not sure what but I need to immerse myself in something that makes me happy and brings out the creativity in me. I have to learn to deal with my emotions and quit letting them bottle up and run over.
It feels as tho there is a gaping hole in the middle of me, like I have misplaced or lost or just haven't yet found that one piece of me, and I'm just now really figuring out that I have to have that piece too.
As of late..................
As the season's change I have noticed some changes in myself. I've realized I'm getting older, and needless to say I don't like it one bit. I feel as tho I'm loosing a little bit of myself, and oddly enough finding it in unexpected places. I sometimes wish I could be past this time, I just don't want to put in the work it takes to transform into a more grown up, better understood, more significant person. I feel a tiny bit irrational at times. I'm not sure if it's all the changes going on or not, but I feel like I'm getting left behind, or maybe leaving the me I've known for so very long behind, and that's a scary thought. I'm slowly approaching 29 and I know that's not old, but damn if I don't feel old. I feel like I have somehow turned into an old lady. I take care of my children, take care of the house and the bills and take care of my husband. There's not much room left after that. I feel like it is a repetitive circle of the same things. I know that, all these things I just named are normal and what most stay at home mom's do. I'm just a bit lost.......... I'm not sure what it is I need to learn to be going through this process, maybe patience or the art of gracefully getting older and wiser......who knows? All I know is I'm not feeling it right now, and I don't wanna deal with it.
I've been going around in circles in my mind trying to figure out why I feel so disconnected and out of it, it seems like a maddening circle of the why's, what's, and how's. And what makes me the most upset about it all is that I can answer none of those questions.
I wonder if all these rapidly changing emotions I have are letting me know I'm crazy or that there is a greater reason behind it all. I guess only time will tell, but I wish I knew now, it might help me understand me better, or be able to handle it better. I always thought I was good with change, I've lived a very chaotic life to say the least, but I was always good at adjusting or so I thought. All I seem to do lately is cry and cry a lot, and for what reason I haven't the slightest clue..........I don't cry often and when I do it's either because I'm truly touched, very angry or genuinely in pain. So this type of reaction makes me angry with myself and it makes me feel weak. I sometimes entertain the thought of just crawling in a hole for a while till it all blows over, but I know that can't happen. I'm a fighter and always have been, but I somehow feel defeated before the first ringing of the bell. I've always heard the hardest opponent is always yourself, guess it's true.
It's almost like I'm on auto-pilot, while I get things lined out in my mind and emotions, and that is not a way to go through life, it tends to make a person feel rather nutty. I'm not sure what it is I seem to be in search of. Is it a more full life? Or is this just how life is supposed to go once you reach a certain age? All these unanswered questions........and no desire to wait around for the answers either..........it just puts me in a tough spot.
Sorry to seem all over the place in my writing, but it sums up how I feel. Thanks for reading and as always Love and Light!
I've been going around in circles in my mind trying to figure out why I feel so disconnected and out of it, it seems like a maddening circle of the why's, what's, and how's. And what makes me the most upset about it all is that I can answer none of those questions.
I wonder if all these rapidly changing emotions I have are letting me know I'm crazy or that there is a greater reason behind it all. I guess only time will tell, but I wish I knew now, it might help me understand me better, or be able to handle it better. I always thought I was good with change, I've lived a very chaotic life to say the least, but I was always good at adjusting or so I thought. All I seem to do lately is cry and cry a lot, and for what reason I haven't the slightest clue..........I don't cry often and when I do it's either because I'm truly touched, very angry or genuinely in pain. So this type of reaction makes me angry with myself and it makes me feel weak. I sometimes entertain the thought of just crawling in a hole for a while till it all blows over, but I know that can't happen. I'm a fighter and always have been, but I somehow feel defeated before the first ringing of the bell. I've always heard the hardest opponent is always yourself, guess it's true.
It's almost like I'm on auto-pilot, while I get things lined out in my mind and emotions, and that is not a way to go through life, it tends to make a person feel rather nutty. I'm not sure what it is I seem to be in search of. Is it a more full life? Or is this just how life is supposed to go once you reach a certain age? All these unanswered questions........and no desire to wait around for the answers either..........it just puts me in a tough spot.
Sorry to seem all over the place in my writing, but it sums up how I feel. Thanks for reading and as always Love and Light!
Thursday, August 15, 2013
Angry and justified.....
Well before I go into what I am so angry about let me first say that I need you guys to please know the following will have some explicit words and for that I am sorry. I just really need to vent and get this shit off my chest. Thanks in advance :)
So we had court yesterday against my husbands ex-wife. We have been going now for what seems like forever, but as of late it is due to her lying to obtain federal money. She went and got welfare benefits back last year and at the time we had my husbands daughter, but did her mother think about it being fraud? oh, no she didn't give 2 shits, all she seen was a way to support her dope habit. So of course the department of child support got involved and when we told them that we had one of the kids and that a grandmother had the other one for the time in question they decided we needed witnesses and a paper trail and so forth so we brought all that to court yesterday when we went. He went in front of the judge and laid it all out plus we had witness testimony also. So one would think that those people had big enough brains in their damn heads to see that she was a fucking liar and that she illegally obtained the funds, and so they did see that but then the child support lawyer after hanging my husbands daughter up on her testimony and catching her in lies decided that he would stop the proceedings right then and there and told the judge straight up that he couldn't get my husband on the grounds he had due to his lying child. So in his anger I'm guessing he decided that if he couldn't make him pay back the money that that bitch went and illegally got then he would make him back up to the beginning of this year and pay child support, so off the jump that puts my husband owing right at $6,000.00 in back support plus a hefty $700.00 a month, mind you he and I have my two kids at home too but when we tried to tell them that all they said was until the adoption of my kids is finalized by the court and my husband (Which is all done except the last court date mind you, their father signed his rights over to my husband back in the spring and we have been waiting on a court date since then.) then they don't count, and that I needed to get a job because it was not his responsibility to take care of my kids. When they said I needed a job he asked them why his ex-wife didn't have to work to support her kids, plus she has a husband who works and makes damn good money. The child support man simply states we gave her a job on paper but we still have you to take care of 74% of the children's needs. Which like my husband said he has no issues with paying support for his kids, (however ungrateful and assholeish they may be) but that he wanted to know how they thought he was gonna survive on what little income they left him after taking the money straight out of his pay check.
My issue is I can't seem to understand how this bitch he had his kids with is above the law. She doesn't take care of her kids and throws them down on whom ever is available at the time and yet they don't get her for neglect or abandonment, and then she commits welfare fraud and still out walking around with not so much as a word said to her. Maybe I'm crazy and it's not what it seems but to me I think she should have to answer for the shit she does and gets away with just like every other person who breaks the law.
Insight into how to calm myself down and not beat the living shit out of this bitch would be greatly appreciated. Thanks again for reading and sorry again for all the wordy durds..lol......
Love and Light and Goddess Bless
Earthchild )O( Shawna
So we had court yesterday against my husbands ex-wife. We have been going now for what seems like forever, but as of late it is due to her lying to obtain federal money. She went and got welfare benefits back last year and at the time we had my husbands daughter, but did her mother think about it being fraud? oh, no she didn't give 2 shits, all she seen was a way to support her dope habit. So of course the department of child support got involved and when we told them that we had one of the kids and that a grandmother had the other one for the time in question they decided we needed witnesses and a paper trail and so forth so we brought all that to court yesterday when we went. He went in front of the judge and laid it all out plus we had witness testimony also. So one would think that those people had big enough brains in their damn heads to see that she was a fucking liar and that she illegally obtained the funds, and so they did see that but then the child support lawyer after hanging my husbands daughter up on her testimony and catching her in lies decided that he would stop the proceedings right then and there and told the judge straight up that he couldn't get my husband on the grounds he had due to his lying child. So in his anger I'm guessing he decided that if he couldn't make him pay back the money that that bitch went and illegally got then he would make him back up to the beginning of this year and pay child support, so off the jump that puts my husband owing right at $6,000.00 in back support plus a hefty $700.00 a month, mind you he and I have my two kids at home too but when we tried to tell them that all they said was until the adoption of my kids is finalized by the court and my husband (Which is all done except the last court date mind you, their father signed his rights over to my husband back in the spring and we have been waiting on a court date since then.) then they don't count, and that I needed to get a job because it was not his responsibility to take care of my kids. When they said I needed a job he asked them why his ex-wife didn't have to work to support her kids, plus she has a husband who works and makes damn good money. The child support man simply states we gave her a job on paper but we still have you to take care of 74% of the children's needs. Which like my husband said he has no issues with paying support for his kids, (however ungrateful and assholeish they may be) but that he wanted to know how they thought he was gonna survive on what little income they left him after taking the money straight out of his pay check.
My issue is I can't seem to understand how this bitch he had his kids with is above the law. She doesn't take care of her kids and throws them down on whom ever is available at the time and yet they don't get her for neglect or abandonment, and then she commits welfare fraud and still out walking around with not so much as a word said to her. Maybe I'm crazy and it's not what it seems but to me I think she should have to answer for the shit she does and gets away with just like every other person who breaks the law.
Insight into how to calm myself down and not beat the living shit out of this bitch would be greatly appreciated. Thanks again for reading and sorry again for all the wordy durds..lol......
Love and Light and Goddess Bless
Earthchild )O( Shawna
Thursday, May 23, 2013
Life at my house........
So, I finally got my backache to leave for the most part, thank the Goddess!!
I'm gonna get this witch's pen cleaned today, after almost a week of a backache the house is in shambles. I hope I can get it all done before the hubby gets up for work. :)
I've finally started working with my oracle cards and I have to say, I love them!! I'm so glad that I am finally getting out of this funk I've been in and actually getting things accomplished.
A few days ago when we got all that bad weather, it was a rush of tornadoes in Oklahoma and here on the home front we had massive flooding. I honestly thought my driveway had transformed itself into a river, at one point I told my husband,"Honey, lets just get a boat, it would be so much easier then these shovels and rakes we are using." That same day after we got the worst of the water contained we had to go pick up the kids from school, the bus never would have made it up the road below us, the river was in the road 3 feet deep all the way across. Goddess willing and the creek don't rise we are gonna try and work on the driveway some this weekend.
Softball season is coming to a close, can't say I'm not kinda glad, not that I don't love watching the girls play because I do and they are getting good at it too, but it is so very exhausting. Like this Friday we have a double header. They girls are gonna be wore plumb out by the time they get done, we will be at the field from 5pm till close to 11pm.
On the day that all the bad weather came my littlest pregnant kitty had her kittens!!! She had 3. A solid white one, a solid black one, and a black and white tabby/calico it has brown on it too. They are absolutely adorable!!! Also my little brother and his wife welcomed their little one to the world too, Little Mattox Timothy!! He is perfect!!! He weighed 8 lbs. 6 oz.
Even in all the destruction the Goddess and God still blessed us!!
Just thought I would give you all an update and let you know I hadn't fell off the face of the earth or floated away!! LOL
As always thanks for reading, hope you enjoy!!
Love and Light
Many Blessings,
Shawna
)O(
I'm gonna get this witch's pen cleaned today, after almost a week of a backache the house is in shambles. I hope I can get it all done before the hubby gets up for work. :)
I've finally started working with my oracle cards and I have to say, I love them!! I'm so glad that I am finally getting out of this funk I've been in and actually getting things accomplished.
A few days ago when we got all that bad weather, it was a rush of tornadoes in Oklahoma and here on the home front we had massive flooding. I honestly thought my driveway had transformed itself into a river, at one point I told my husband,"Honey, lets just get a boat, it would be so much easier then these shovels and rakes we are using." That same day after we got the worst of the water contained we had to go pick up the kids from school, the bus never would have made it up the road below us, the river was in the road 3 feet deep all the way across. Goddess willing and the creek don't rise we are gonna try and work on the driveway some this weekend.
Softball season is coming to a close, can't say I'm not kinda glad, not that I don't love watching the girls play because I do and they are getting good at it too, but it is so very exhausting. Like this Friday we have a double header. They girls are gonna be wore plumb out by the time they get done, we will be at the field from 5pm till close to 11pm.
On the day that all the bad weather came my littlest pregnant kitty had her kittens!!! She had 3. A solid white one, a solid black one, and a black and white tabby/calico it has brown on it too. They are absolutely adorable!!! Also my little brother and his wife welcomed their little one to the world too, Little Mattox Timothy!! He is perfect!!! He weighed 8 lbs. 6 oz.
Even in all the destruction the Goddess and God still blessed us!!
Just thought I would give you all an update and let you know I hadn't fell off the face of the earth or floated away!! LOL
As always thanks for reading, hope you enjoy!!
Love and Light
Many Blessings,
Shawna
)O(
Saturday, May 18, 2013
Trying
Well today as I write, I'm a bit agitated. I have had this seemingly there to stay back pain for days now and it seems as though no matter what I try to do to ease it is is to no avail. It also seems that every time I try to ease the pain it only gets worse. It really is beginning to make me very angry, I suppose that is the way I cope when it comes to pain, instead of just giving in and letting it cripple me so to speak.
So it comes to me today, a grand Ah ha moment, I was reading a fellow blogger's blog and there it was, I already knew about it but hadn't given it any thought. So I am now in the process of making some Cayenne Salve. Hopefully in a few hours when it is done and ready to use I can get some relief!!!
I'm excited to report that my amazing husband took a night off from work on Thursday, while home he did some outside chore's that needed to be done and bless his heart he built me a raised bed for my herb garden. I was so excited!! I'm glad to say that my dear herbs look much more happy in their new home and I'm hopeful they will grow big and strong!!!
So sorry that the first half of today's blog is more or less bitching, but I needed to get it off my chest!! Have a great weekend and many blessings to each and everyone of you!!!
Love and Light
Shawna
)O(
Thursday, May 16, 2013
Doin.......
Well my weekend out of town was good but tiresome. I got to spend time with my sister for her birthday and talk about her upcoming wedding, 5 weeks to go!!
I also spent some time with my mom, which I enjoyed, I used to never think I would miss her when she lived 10 minutes from me but now that we are 2 hours apart I miss her like crazy and wish she lived closer. Our relationship is so much better then it once was when I was a child, we don't fight and argue and she is not abusive anymore. All good things in my book and now I love spending time with her and trying to learn some of her wisdom if it is only a small bit here and there. She loved her mother's day present and i was thrilled!!
Also while out of town, I went to the green house my sister and other mom work at and stocked up on some good herbs for my herb garden and some flowers of course, what woman doesn't like flowers right?? I got some vegetable plants for the big garden, we got those in the ground yesterday, OMG it was a million degrees out it seemed like, what time we were planting!! I thought I would melt, I mentioned to my husband that when I was a kid you almost had to beat me to get me to come in and now all I wanted to do was sit in front of an air conditioner and enjoy the coolness....lol.......
So the herbs I got are: Stevia, a new one for me, I haven't tried growing it before, but I'm hoping it grows well I would like to make some extraction from it for a sweetener. Sage, I grow it every year, just hope it is huge this year and I can make many smudge sticks with it!! Basil, Dill, Cilantro, Thyme, Echinacea, another new one I'm excited about!! Oh and Lavender, can't wait for it to start flowering, I just love the way it smells. Oh and just for the local bee's here I got a red honeysuckle!! They are so very pretty and smell amazing and the bees love them which is great, gotta keep the little fellers happy!!
I'm currently working on a new BOS, right now just mainly brainstorming on what I want it to look like and what I want to put in it. I have 3 now already that started out as one all in a binder but a lot of it is just information for most anything I would need to know right off the top of my head. So this new one I want to have a personal feel and only have what I want to put in it, in it if that makes sense. I'm thinking about actually making this one more scrapbook like with sewn in tags and flaps and cute little sayings that have tons of meaning magickally. Any suggestions would be great, I'm just kinda swimming around in the water of possibility right now, and let me tell you that is one big body of water.
Thanks for reading, hope you enjoyed!!
Love and Light
BB
Shawna
)O(
I also spent some time with my mom, which I enjoyed, I used to never think I would miss her when she lived 10 minutes from me but now that we are 2 hours apart I miss her like crazy and wish she lived closer. Our relationship is so much better then it once was when I was a child, we don't fight and argue and she is not abusive anymore. All good things in my book and now I love spending time with her and trying to learn some of her wisdom if it is only a small bit here and there. She loved her mother's day present and i was thrilled!!
Also while out of town, I went to the green house my sister and other mom work at and stocked up on some good herbs for my herb garden and some flowers of course, what woman doesn't like flowers right?? I got some vegetable plants for the big garden, we got those in the ground yesterday, OMG it was a million degrees out it seemed like, what time we were planting!! I thought I would melt, I mentioned to my husband that when I was a kid you almost had to beat me to get me to come in and now all I wanted to do was sit in front of an air conditioner and enjoy the coolness....lol.......
So the herbs I got are: Stevia, a new one for me, I haven't tried growing it before, but I'm hoping it grows well I would like to make some extraction from it for a sweetener. Sage, I grow it every year, just hope it is huge this year and I can make many smudge sticks with it!! Basil, Dill, Cilantro, Thyme, Echinacea, another new one I'm excited about!! Oh and Lavender, can't wait for it to start flowering, I just love the way it smells. Oh and just for the local bee's here I got a red honeysuckle!! They are so very pretty and smell amazing and the bees love them which is great, gotta keep the little fellers happy!!
I'm currently working on a new BOS, right now just mainly brainstorming on what I want it to look like and what I want to put in it. I have 3 now already that started out as one all in a binder but a lot of it is just information for most anything I would need to know right off the top of my head. So this new one I want to have a personal feel and only have what I want to put in it, in it if that makes sense. I'm thinking about actually making this one more scrapbook like with sewn in tags and flaps and cute little sayings that have tons of meaning magickally. Any suggestions would be great, I'm just kinda swimming around in the water of possibility right now, and let me tell you that is one big body of water.
Thanks for reading, hope you enjoyed!!
Love and Light
BB
Shawna
)O(
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